No shame in reaching out for help with “extreme” teens

 In Opinion

Not all children thrive like dandelions – some of them are orchids, and when these “special” kids become teens, trouble is sometimes not far behind.  

An “extreme” teen might be a teen with a learning disability, some social anxiety, a pre-disposition to depression, a sense of entitlement, or a just a good old strong will. Parenting takes on an added twist with these kids.  

Add in the legalization of marijuana, social media pressure, or busy parents, and a tipping point into trouble can happen fairly quickly.  

Experienced clinicians trained in the “Maturity Model” at the Pine River Institute (a local residential treatment program for youth), Tara McGee and Liz van Ryn are local therapist who have joined forces to run an education and support group to help parents who are either struggling with their teen, or just worried.   

Workshops will help parents understand teen behavior in a totally different way, making it easier to respond rather than react to behavior, developing a healthy connection with teens, setting appropriate limits for them, and getting parents the respect they deserve.

They will start with teaching how the teenage brain works, and then move into practical strategies for increasing what they call attunement, and setting boundaries and limits that work.  Over the course of four evening sessions they will cover off everyday concerns such as curfews, chores, and cell phone rules, as well as more extreme behaviours such as substance abuse, excessive gaming, self-harming behavior, and poor school attendance.

Following the series of four workshops, van Ryn and McGee will launch an ongoing bi-weekly support group for parents. More intense therapy for the teen, the parents, or the family is also available if necessary.

“We live in a world where there is tremendous pressure to have well-adjusted kids, who are succeeding and moving forward in their lives. And we know that there are lots of parents out there with teens who have lost their way, and who feel alone because of the stigma about reaching out for help,” said van Ryn.  

McGee adds that, “parents with kids who are struggling with behavior, substance abuse, or mental health are sometimes so embarrassed that they live in fear of running into a friend at the grocery store who might ask about how the kids are doing.”  

But what McGee and van Ryn know is that teen troubles are not isolated to any particular type of family.  It is often a perfect storm of factors that can centre around one child in the family.  

“Our workshops are designed to help you overcome the stigma and the embarrassment so that you can accept that this is where you are at, and move forward to support your teenager in the best way possible,” they said.

This program will run Thursdays at 6 p.m. in Collingwood starting October 25.

For more information or to register contact liz@creeksidetherapy.ca or tmcgeepsychotherapy@gmail.com.

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