Splash yoga coming to Village Green this spring

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The Creemore Echo has learned of a group of rogue fitness enthusiasts who are launching Splashercise classes at Creemore Village Green.

Officials said they have just recently become aware of organized fitness activities at the splash pad but admit they should have predicted it.

“Come to think of it there was a group of people who were pretty adamant about including a splash pad at the park but of course it was all under the guise that it be for the children. Well, now we know what their true motivation was,” said an unnamed Village Green spokesperson.

“What were we supposed to do? We knew there was no money in the municipal budget for a watersports complex in Creemore so we just gradually insinuated ourselves in the planning process and bided our time,” said a woman found doing self guided aqua therapy in the fountain.

Now that the park is fully operational, it is not known how these splashercise enthusiasts can be kept out of the splash pad.

“Our kids are now watching from the sidelines as the adults take part in all kinds of splash pad fitness classes,” said spokesperson for DOYC – the Dejected and Overheated Youth of Creemore. “Now, we are hearing of early morning Splash Yoga, what will they think of next?”

It would appear the park is becoming an incubator for high level sport.

The Echo has also learned that a competitive table tennis team representing Village Green has earned a spot at the world competition in China this summer, and there is also a midnight lawn bowling league making its way up the competitive ranks. Creemore seems to have an unusually high calibre of beanbag tossers in its population because we understand the pressure is on for Village Green to host the national cornhole competition this fall. We are expecting an announcement about these competitions on April 1 (April Fool’s Day).

One unexpected outcome is that the splash pad users are now campaigning for bidets to be included in future washroom plans at Station on the Green.

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